Make Me or Break Me

following on the previous post, about women in hollywood (occasionally i drive through hollywood, :) ), i just want to say that the reason i post very little about the actual day-to-day making of my documentary here is that

  1. in its details, it’s boring. the time we got locked out of our host’s home after returning from a shoot at 3:00 am and had to sleep in our car…well, almost enough time has passed for that one to be uproarious. documentary filmmaking is lots of agonizing beforehand during pre-production, excel spreadsheets, and slow, incremental work. people are only interested in the result.
  2. it could be bad juju to talk out the story before delicate wisps of inspiration have properly mated with the beady-eyed, muscle-bound lug of perspiration.
  3. my personal creed is “Never complain, never explain.” see Scarcity of Women in Hollywood, and, I’ll Be Damned If I Ever Cry in Public/On the Job.

nevertheless, there are times when you don’t realize how much energy it takes to hold something together til it falls apart and you fall apart a little bit with it.

this week was like that. let’s just say that some major sources of funding dried up, the grant landscape is looking bleak, and pledges to support have not been fulfilled. those realities were like a nice snug brick pillow to rest my weary head upon.

which brings me to rule #4: it’s no use, i’m just going to do it anyway.

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